I dreamt I was at home and daddy was making his pancakes while Jackson broke the sink and flooded the whole kitchen. And then Lily and Oliver came over and Lily took a pair of Hannah's shoes because hers got wet.

It was such a weird dream but I really just miss home. I miss my family. My friends. My life. I can be Hannah here but no one really knows her. It doesn't really matter what name I go by. What's the point of Hannah when I can't be Hannah?

I just wanna go home now. And hey, why did I land here, anyway? I'm not the one trying to ruin my cousin's life. How come Cousin Lou Ann didn't end up here?

Why is everyone except me getting super powers? Not that I need them but, you know... Though this is kinda creepy...

All right kids, or whoever's going to this school here... I've got some good news! From today on, your music and dance teacher will be the one and only Hannah Montana! This, ladies and gentlemen, deserves the Hannah Happy Dance. Don't worry, I'll teach you guys how to do it once you're there. See you at school!

And hey, people at Celestial Being, you're gonna have to learn how to dance, too. Dance lessons at that beach party you're planning? Yes I think so.

.......Okay, someone tell me what I was listening to last night. It sounded like it was coming from the room right above mine.

All right guys, if anyone needs me, I'm in the bathroom. And I'm never coming out. I love this house! Oh yeah and Allelujah, once I'm done settling in, it's time to clear out your wardrobe. No escape.


((ooc: REL SAID IT'S OKAY THAT HANNAH MOVES UP INTO CBHAUS SO. THIS IS WHERE SHE IS NOW. Don't judge me.))

One~ more~ day~! Hey, Allelujah, can I move up to your house? You guys have this really big house with a lot of rooms, right? And there's enough room for me to squeeze in, right? ...And you do have a bathroom, right?

But it's kinda weird... that I've been here for a whole month now. I miss home. I miss Jackson. Ughh nasty.

You know what's great here? No carrots. I haven't been forced to eat any carrots like I was at home when dad tried to hide them in my meal ever since I've been here. And that's awesome. Cause you know, I don't really like anything with the word "rot" in it. I mean, really... car-rot? That just can't be healthy.

Oh but hey, what in the world's going on here? ...I'm not supposed to be at work today, right? Everyone's going crazy and I don't think it's the good kind of crazy like when there was this photoshooting with Orlando Bloom and everyone freaked out. So I'm just gonna stay right here and hide in my room until this blows over. And eat food that doesn't have carrots. Man, if Lily were right now, we could bounce around over the no-carrots diet.

Ladies and gentlemen, Hannah Montana ~ on her way to get her very own bathroom! Oh yeah.

Got a job, got a place to live, still getting out of here as soon as I figured out how.


But what's the deal with people disappearing lately? Something going on here I don't know about? This ain't a secret We're Letting People Go Home And Don't Tell Hannah thing, right? ...Right? The place's creepy enough normally, why's everyone panicking now?

All right, listen people, here's the deal.

Toilets? Are your friends.

There's gotta be a way to have a working toilet in this boarding house. I mean, honestly? Even a decent outhouse like uncle Earl's would be fine at this point. How do you guys even live in a place like this?

No makeup here either. How am I not supposed to look like a zombie when there's not even makeup? Maybe it's dark enough so all the cute guys don't notice. Mmm the dark is your friend... and I'm so not afraid of sleeping alone in the dark. Good thing Beary isn't with me. He'd be scared.

Soo... what do I have to do to get a decent bathroom? I want to go up to where Allelujah lives.

Girl who works in the temple and is really spacey say what?

...No use in talking to her, huh? The place isn't too bad if you ignore that it's stinky and cold and dark and totally not what a delicate girl like me should live in, but sure, I can get used to it. There's nothing Hannah Montana can't get used to. …But I wanna home anyway.

Right. Calm down. Calm down, Miley. This is just like when you were stuck in Jackson's room. You can get out of this. Believe in yourself, believe...... who am I kidding? This is worse than uncle Earl's shack back in Tennessee… It's worse than the dentist! Ugh, dentist…

…

So, uh, anyone nice enough to point me to a safe and less stinky place? My heels broke off so it's hard to walk around. Please? You'll get...

A free backstage pass and an autograph from the one and only Hannah Montana! Yay! Isn’t that great?

…Maybe?


...not going to work here, is it?